Tag Archives: confidence issue

Where Were We?

17 Feb

So, here’s the report: Last night’s “experiment” went very well. Is it the beginning of something bigger and deeper? I’m not sure. I did get invited by one of the girls from last night to go to a local Mardi Gras parade today, but I wasn’t feeling well and after work I simply went home to lie down.

I’m excited about the prospect of new friends and at the same time apprehensive. I’m always afraid to put any stresses on my relationship with hubs because I tend to get kind of weird. I’ll begin constantly asking him if he’s angry or if I’m doing something wrong. Totally a confidence issue, but it makes me try to avoid the situation all the same. I hope that he’ll be ok with me being a little more “out of the house”. People tell me it shouldn’t matter and I should do what I want to, the end. But, it does matter. His opinion will always be a big influence on my life as much as my opinion influences him (and it does, believe me). I guess that’s really the definition of marriage. Agreeing to compromise.

Packing. Not going well. Remember that really organized packing plan I made for myself? Yea… no. I’ve run out of boxes and have yet to get all the trinkets away so I came up with a new plan: Since I only have 5 boxes (which is really all that will fit in my car at once) I will pack up all the boxes, drive them to the new apartment, then unpack them and PUT THINGS WHERE THEY BELONG, take the empty boxes back to the old apartment and do it again! This forces me to unpack as I’m moving! I won’t have any boxes stacked up waiting for me to get to them to unpack them! Really, I’m wondering why I didn’t think of this first. I’ll call it “Rotational Relocation”. Rotating the same 5 boxes to move everything from one place to the other and since we won’t be actually sleeping at the new apartment until a week after we’ve had it it’ll gives us plenty of time to work on it slowly and do it properly. Especially since we’ll both still be working a full day for most of that week. Only two weeks until we begin moving now. I’m excited.

Diet. Not going well either. I need to clear my head again. I need to get my mind in the place where everyday I wake up, go online and find a dress I want to wear and look good in, print it out and put it on the wall right before I make my first shake of the day. I have got to do this. I have also got to start walking further each day. I know Chase won’t mind. The new apartment complex doesn’t have a gym in it, so I better get used to finding time to go somewhere and work out. I have got to get in shape. Seriously. So, I just had a shake, tomorrow I will have nothing but shakes all day. Wish me luck.

Also, I’ve been working on a digital art project which is something I haven’t done in a while. When it’s finished I’ll post it here. It’s sort of a Doctor Who poster/t-shirt type thingy. Maybe. I hardly ever know what my art will be until it is. You know?