Tag Archives: chores

Wound Tight

29 Feb

It’s been a while, folks. Tomorrow is the big day. The day we go sign the lease on the new apartment and get the keys to begin moving in. It’s stressful, but in a good way. It has made me a little short and I can feel myself stretched onto the ledge just barely hanging on. I feel wound like a rubberband… with just the wrong touch I’ll fly off and snap. I’m working hard trying to maintain positivity, but I can feel the anxiety hiding just under the surface. It scares me and that makes it worse.

Tonight I watched Benny and Joon. I love that movie. It always makes me smile. I hope one day to have a house as colorful and fun as hers looks in the movie.

I think Shawn knows I’m on the tipping point… he hardly spoke to me yesterday. Maybe I’m just imagining something out of paranoia, though. He tells me I do that a lot.

I don’t really have anything to report. I just felt like I should probably try typing some stuff out to help me relax a little.

I don’t think it’s working though. I need to find something else to do. I’m just scared. I don’t want to fall out right now. I have too much to do and we only have 2 weeks to get everything moved and cleaned. I can’t fall out right now. I need to stay happy.

Comics and Confessions

19 Feb

Have I ever told you guys that my husband is the most fantastic and awesome guy ever? He is. Seriously. Yesterday he came home from work with a bundle of flattened boxes all bound together by some masking tape. I love that he listens. I never even asked him for more boxes! And then today he took me to get coffee and then to the comic book shop where I got an issue of the Doctor Who comics (the 2010 annual) and an issue of The Doctor Who Companion magazine! I think my affection for DW may be getting out of hand, but as long as Shawn is enjoying it as much as I am then who cares?

I want to get a tattoo. I love tattoos! This one will probably be next, because sometimes if I think about a tattoo too long I’ll talk myself out of it and what fun is that? I want to get sort of a cameo with lace around the outside but in the middle instead of a silhouette I want a picture of the tardis with roses growing behind it. And somewhere in the lace, kind of hidden I want the words “Bad Wolf” stitched into the lines. And then underneath the whole thing, maybe overlapping the cameo a little, banner that says “Allons-y”. I need this. It will go on the outside of my right ankle/lower calf.

Confession: I had pizza today and yesterday. That is totally NOT diet friendly. I feel like I need the move. I need this total reset to be able to get my life back together. My apartment is a mess (today I took out 3 bags full of trash). I guess ever since my last episode… I didn’t clean at all during it and the house fell apart. Big time. I just haven’t had the motivation yet to get up take it all back. I really hate the fallout from it. I was watching the United States of Tara and she was talking about how much she hated cleaning up after her other personalities… I kind of knew pretty much how she felt. Obviously not entirely… but, by the time I’m feeling like myself again there’s usually mess and destruction all around me. Not always physical either. It puts a lot of stress on my personal relationships.

There is another side to bipolar… not just myself and Skadi… there’s also the manic side. When I feel so happy and energized I could just bounce off the walls. It’s also the reason I was first misdiagnosed as ADHD. But, it gets to the point where I’m obviously not acting like myself anymore (I usually get the “Are you ok?” and the “What are you on?” questions). I’m a fairly calm and down to earth person in general. I like to be happy, but quietly. I haven’t had a good flash of manic for a while now. I could use one with the move coming up. I tend to get so much done. Endless amounts of energy, and like this crazy super focus. It’s like I can hone in on one thing like a missile and ignore everything else.  I could really use that right now. I need to get a lot done.

So… best to start right now. I’m going to put on some indie-rock on Pandora (welcome back springtime!) and I’ll work on cleaning, laundry and packing.

TTYL

Talking to No One

12 Feb

Yesterday, I did something rather strange. I set my little voice recorder to record and just talked. I was home alone and not feeling well. I had also been watching Dr. Who most of the day (surprisingly thought provoking). I talked to no one for roughly 45 minutes. Saying anything that came to mind. Getting everything out into the air.

Afterwards, I pressed play to listen back to it and see if I could make sense of it. It only recorded the first 10 minutes. I have to admit I was kind of disappointed. But, then I was kind of relieved. I had touched on some rather serious issues from my past and even though it felt good to talk about them… I’m not ready to share them.

I’m feeling well lately and have been packing for the upcoming move. I’ll admit I haven’t quite gotten back to the place I was in when I started this blog. Though, even now I’m noticing that if I just sit down and begin typing, surely something will appear on the page. Perhaps I should try more often to just sit and type. Who knows what would come out.

We’re still waiting for this cycle to get well under way so that we can attempt the baby-making again. I’d feel awful if I got pregnant this month. 9 months from now is the biggest project of the year at work and I’d be ready to pop right in the middle of it all (Not to mention 3 hours from home and without Shawn). So, we’re thinking we may not try too hard this month… my luck, that’ll be when it happens. The name topic has come up again (as it always does). I was playing around with the Baby Name Genie when it suggested Lillian Jane. Such a pretty name. The obvious problem is that every single form of Lillian including Lilla, Lilly, Lil and so on and so forth are all in the top 50 names. I brought up this sad news to my hubs and he got kind of ruffled with me and said “I don’t give a damn what number they are. I like the name Abigail, if it’s in the top 50, who cares?”. I was at first both taken aback and slightly excited by his laissez-faire attitude toward the whole thing. I guess, I’ve always been so afraid of my child going through what I went through being an Ashley in the great big “Ashley-era”. But, I think he may be right. If I like a name perhaps I shouldn’t shove it aside for something I like less just because other people like it too. So for right now the name on the top of the girl list is Abigael Elise. The boy list is still topped out by the only ever agreed upon male name Silas and since Shawn could care less what the middle name will be I’m voting for Beckett or Elliott.

I have to tell you, though… I have always had this really strong feeling that I’d have a baby girl first. Then, my grandmother did the thing where you hang the pencil from the sewing needle and thread (She’s really good at getting it right) told me I’d have a girl then a boy and then a girl. Silly really, because I have never in my life wanted more than 2 children and right now I’m considering having only one for financial reasons. And I’m a big believer in vasectomy. Still… something has always whispered “girl” in the back of my mind. I wouldn’t mind a boy… it’s just that feeling.

Anyway, I’ll be off now. I’m giving up on listing a to-do list. It rarely gets done!

My Packing List

3 Feb

Today is the day I begin packing. I’m going to start early and hopefully that will make the transition as easy as possible. Moving day is set for March 1st, however, our current lease isn’t up until March 15th. That gives me two weeks to move everything which also means we will not be renting a moving truck (yay!). Last time we moved the truck ended up costing around $100 after gas and all that. I’m trying to save as much money as possible during this transition so that’s one way. I can move most of the boxes and smaller furniture in my car. The back seats fold down to give a good bit of room  and we will borrow my step-dad’s pickup truck for one day on a weekend and use it to haul the big stuff. I think it should only take 1 or 2 trips.

Now I’m going to put together a packing plan…

-4 weeks:

  • winter clothes (it never got cold enough to wear them this year!)
  • Knick knacks (I have LOTS)
  • DVD’s/Records/CD’s/etc. (we can live off of internet media)
  • Books (I have my Nook to hold me over)

-3 weeks:

  • Consolidate seasonal (1 Halloween box, 2 Xmas boxes, 1 random other box)
  • Craft supplies (Yarn… oh the yarn…)
  • Jewelry (leave out a couple pieces for work)
  • Shoes (leave out 3 pairs: one black, one brown, one sandal)
  • purses

-2 weeks:

  • Decorations (lots of wall decorations)
  • Curtains
  • Extra linens
  • Kitchen Gadgets (the ones we rarely use like the quesadilla maker and waffle iron)
  • Pet supplies (I’ll leave out the shampoo, brush and food because I always bathe him just before moving him to a new house)
  • Clothes (leave out about 1 week worth and 2 nice outfits for meetings)

-1 week:

  • Dishes (leave a couple out for use during the week)
  • Pantry items
  • Spices/Oils/Etc.
  • Electronics (except for tv/desktop computer)
  • Throw pillows
  • Files (finances important papers, etc.)
  • Office supplies

Moving Day:

  • Move all things already packed (We’ll probably still be sleeping in the old apartment for a day or so until the weekend when we can get a pickup truck)
  • Submit change of address form

First weekend:

  • Furniture (bed, bed frame, headboard, 2 living chairs, sofa, cedar chest, jewelry cabinet, bicycle)
  • Smaller furniture with car (coffee table, end tables, tea cart)
  • Dog and Bird
  • Bathroom items

Follow-up:

  • Anything left over
  • Bring anything unwanted to local charity thrift store
  • clean old apartment and fix any wall damage
  • Move cleaning supplies/vacuum
  • Drop off key

This seems like a good plan. I’ll be referencing this a lot in the upcoming month as I try to get everything together.

As for today, I’ll be working most of the day on a project/presentation to be due on Monday so not much time for much else. But, I will try to get some packing done. There will be lots of tea.

Getting Organized

16 Jan

Today, I woke up with a lot of energy. I feel like today is a day for getting things done. Mostly, organizing.

I am not the neatest or most organized person on the planet (by far). I always struggle with keeping things in order, on time and generally from being a giant mess. So, today I’m researching some creative organization tips and thought I’d share some very useful ones with you!

SO handy!

So, this is an awesome idea! I love the hanging canisters by ribbons from the hooks along the bottom. I think this would be great for the various notepads I have around the office as well as my business cards, etc. I could put a ruler where the have wrapping paper. This would definitely free up some space on my desk.

Clothespin To-Do

Adorable and flexible!

I love this to-do list because you can easily move things around and it looks a whole lot nicer than all the post-it notes piled around the edge of my computer monitor. My to-do lists are massive.

File Box

So cute!

This is adorable! Especially since I’m always needing to file something and I hate filing cabinets with a passion! Although, I may replace the letter with a pretty printed tag or something like that; this is still a fantastic idea! If you click on the picture it will take you to a tutorial on how to make this awesome box (and a fantastic craft blog).

So, those are the ideas I have brewing at present. I had a really cute idea for something else, but I’ll have to see whether or not it’s cost-effective before I make it. I’m kinda broke, after all.

Also, today I have been pondering baby names. Again (still in cycle #1… OPK has not shown positive yet this month). I think the naming will be one of my favorite parts of having a baby. For me, it sets forth a part of their personality (Although, I watched an interesting documentary once that claimed names have very little true impact on children aside from job opportunities). Here’s the list of names I’m pondering today. Keep in mind none of these have been approved by the hubs, so many of these are probably not really in the running. (I’m putting the meanings of the name after each one)

Girls:

  1. Zoe – Life (I just love the meaning. I hope that my child would be able to embody it daily)
  2. Heidi – Noble
  3. Kaylan – Slender
  4. Riley – Rye clearing (an ex-coworker I know and rather dislike named her daughter this so… iffy)
  5. Corinne – Maiden (koh-rin…. may be confusing because my aunt’s name is Karin…)

Boys:

  1. Reese – Enthusiasm (another great meaning)
  2. Owen – Well born
  3. Finn – Fair
  4. Seamus – Supplanter (This was the name of someone from my past that was a really negative influence… but it’s such a nice name)
  5. Alan – Rock

So, those are my thoughts for now. No to-do list as I’m short on time right now.

An Air of “Blah”

7 Jan

Today is simply one of those days when I don’t feel much like doing anything. The hubs went to work early this morning leaving me home all by my lonesome. Sure, I’ll get some cleaning done, but I’m just feeling “blah”.

So what do you do on “blah” days? Go for a walk. Get out of the house, take the dog and just go somewhere else… I would do that until I remembered I let hubs take my car this morning (his car hates me and every time I drive it something breaks… so I don’t). So Chase and I had to amuse ourselves by walking around the apartment complex. It’s kind of an icky day so we didn’t walk very far but here are a couple photos from our journey:

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The ducks are back in town for the winter.

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Chase is due a haircut soon, I think.

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Looking out into Lake Pontchartrain.

 The walk was nice. We brought the ducks some left over Christmas cookies. They seemed to appreciate them.

Well, now the time has come for me to clean house and get my chores done for the weekend. Tonight my mother and I are headed out to see a Greg Allman concert at the Hard Rock Casino as well as use up the free buffet ticket they sent me for my birthday! I want to try and do my hair pretty, like the waterfall braid tutorial I found the other day…. we’ll see if I can manage it. I’m usually rather clumsy and my hair is just getting long enough to dip past my shoulders.

TODAY:

  1. Laundry & cleaning
  2. Drink coffee
  3. Go to the gym
  4. Go to the casino
  5. Win money
  6. See music
  7. Sleep!